Things My Cat Hates/Does Not Hate

– by Michael!
I’m really a dog person. I grew up with dogs, I know how to act with dogs, I’m comfortable with dogs. I never honestly disliked cats, but I also never really interacted with them. Abbey (pictured below in a rare moment of grace) has been a bit of an adjustment for me, but I think I’ve got a handle on a few of the things that she hates and some of the things she does not hate (‘love’ is not really part of Abbey’s emotional makeup).

D’awwwww she’s so cute when she’s not destroying everything.

 Things my cat hates: 

  • A full laundry rack
  • Being petted
  • Cat food
  • Not being petted
  • Knowing where her toys are
  • Her water bowl
  • That one plant that The Human Slaves keep moving so that she can destroy it in a new place
  • The underside of any piece of upholstered furniture
  • The Human Slaves sleeping for more than an hour at a time
  • The Human Slaves shutting the bedroom door so that they can sleep for more than an hour at a time
  • Her crate
  • Curtains
  • Being in any form of moving vehicle
  • The couch
  • Using her scratching post as a scratching post
  • Yarn
  • Bathtime (this is beyond hate, and journeys into the realm of anathema)

Things my cat does not hate: 
  • Tuna, because it makes her smell so interesting
  • Anything that was put on top of the bar, because it MUST be the laser pointer
  • Yarn
  • The couch
  • Food left on the counter to thaw, especially chicken
  • Sleeping on her bed
  • Sleeping on our bed
  • Sleeping on the writing table
  • Sleeping on the couch
  • Assaulting the Human Slaves’s ankles while they are carrying hot beverages
  • Running up and down the hallway with the graceful, sinuous motion of a drunken miniature elephant with an inner ear infection
  • Doing the above at 3am
  • Fussing at The Human Slaves when they have been gone too long
  • Occasionally showing just enough affection to The Human Slaves so that they forget all of the annoying things or, better yet, remember them as amusing.

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